I know quite a few people who’ve done stupid stuff on a bike. My friend, Mark, used to love taking people out for quick blasts on his fireblade when he was half cut, which was fine until he got pulled over. A friend of John’s thought it would be a good idea to try and out run the police car that was attempting to pull him over for doing a wheelie on the highway, forgetting the license plate was in full view at the back and it wasn’t a stolen bike.

My “moments” in contrast are less impactful but far more embarrassing for it and for some reason, they pretty much all involve ramps. For those of you that don’t know I ride both street and dirt. My first such moment came when I was unloading my brand-spanking new KTM450EXC off the back of Nick’s pickup truck. We put the ramp out and I figured it would be a good idea to ride it down. I’m not sure how far down the ramp I was when I changed my mind, but I ended up tipping the bike off the side with it landing half on top of me. Luckily, I was unhurt and managed to laugh it off. The bike was fine too and has behaved impeccably ever since.

My second ramp moment involves the Daytona. Last year, I was out-voted by the family who all wanted to go to Nova Scotia and PEI. Faced with the prospect of Anne of Green Gables and Ceilidhs for three weeks, I agreed but only on the condition I could take my bike and would ride around. This meant we did the entire trip in a Honda Ridgeline with me riding once we got there (Look for the routes I took coming soon). Now, the ridgeline is great in that it has a massive trunk in the bed so that you don’t need to cram the cab full of stuff. One night, we arrived in upstate Maine or somewhere in New England anyway and I realized something was in the trunk. To get in, I had to remove the bike, but this was no big deal. I’d done it loads of times. Bike comes off, I get stuff out but i’m tired after a days driving and decide it can wait until tomorrow to go back up.

Next morning is somewhat cold and misty and having spent the night in a hotel bed, I also haven’t really slept. So, tired and grouchy as opposed to just my normal grouchy, I put the ramp out and fire up the daytona. After letting the engine warm, I back the bike up and start to walk it up the ramp, ascending the step ladders I also use. Half way up, I stall the bike, of course. Thumbing the starter, it fires up fine but I somehow manage to over-twist the throttle while popping the clutch. At this point, the front wheel is actually in the bed and it’s entirely possible, as it’s on an angle, that I also didn’t release the brake at the point either. The upshot was that the rear wheel spun and fired the ramp out from under the bike. The bottom of the fairing hit the truck and I am stuck in the middle of the parking lot stranded. Suffice to say, I did manage to get out of it with only very minor fairing damage, but it wasn’t thanks to the restaurant staff who stood in the doorway smoking despite my gesturing for help.

And that brings me to Friday. Picture the perfect weekend planned. Up to the cottage for the weekend, temperatures about 20 celcius and clear blue skies forecast. I decided that as I’m still technically not supposed to be riding because of this arm problem that I’d truck the daytona up and ride Saturday and Sunday. Cue another moment. I put the truck at the bottom of the driveway, so I can flatten the ramp a little. I put the ramp on the truck and the ladders out and wheel the daytona from the garage. Firing up the engine, I proceed to wheel the daytona under power up the ramp. As I hit the step ladders, I somehow manage to lose my balance and fall back to the floor. At this point, the daytona is coming over but I manage to balance it on my hip. As I attempt to push her more upright, the ramp slides on the floor and the rear wheel decides it would be a good idea to leave the tread. By this time I am desperate and I start shouting for my neighbor to see if he can help, but I know he’s at work. Worth a shot, just in case he got fired or something.

I can stand here for the rest of the day hoping someone is going to come along, or I can try to get myself out of this. Opting for the latter, I summon all my strength and start to right the bike. It’s getting upright. A little too upright and there is goes over the other side only now I’m not there to hold it up. At this point, I should stress it’s fallen no more than about 24 inches but it’s enough.

After moving the truck out the way and righting the bike, I take stock of the damage. The right mirror has flown off and landed on the other side of my neighbors yard. The rear indictor has smashed it’s cover but still works and there’s more than a few superficial scratches on the fairing. Overall, not too bad I figure. I then get on the bike and ride it back up the drive way to put it away. Tapping the rear brake, I realize the head of the lever has also shorn, but at least the brake still bites fine. Oh and the front brake needs to be pumped a few times to prime it – guess that needs a bleed too.

I called the dealer and it’s going to do me about $250 in parts and that’s not dealing with the fairing.

I think it’s time I went to get another ramp. That or I have to learn to love sitting in traffic for 45 minutes, just so I can ride out of town.

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