In praise of the intellectual rider

Cop: Do you know why I stopped you?

Biker: Let’s see… I was going with the flow of traffic, my signal lights are working and I use them when changing lanes; brake light in order (I do the T-CLOCS thing) … so, no, I have no idea… maybe you wanted to admire my awesome bike.

Cop: Humm! Do you know at what speed you were going?

Biker: The speed limit I am sure.

Cop: Really? What’s the speed limit?

Biker: Ah… the maximum velocity at which a vehicle is permitted to travel, as arbitrarily established by municipal, county or state law.

Cop: Are you some kind of comedian?

Biker: No, but if I were you would be giving me lots of material.

Cop: Here’s your ticket. Slow down.

Biker: See you in court. Have a flashy day officer

A few days later.

Judge: You stand accused of breaking code 117-C, how do you plead?

Biker: I usually plead on my knees your honor

Judge: Very funny… guilty or not guilty

Biker: Oh… not guilty your honor

Judge: Officer Malone has a different opinion

Biker: I am surprised Officer Malone has ANY opinion at all

Judge: Are you trying to be smart with me?

Biker: No your honor, I am not trying. I actually am smart.

Judge: 10 days in county jail for contempt of court

Biker: I’m afraid that is not possible your honor

Judge: Really? And why is that?

Biker: Because contempt requires familiarity, your honor, and frankly I don't know you or the court.

Judge: 15 days in county jail.

Later that day.

Cellmate: What are you in for?

Biker: For exceeding the IQ limit…