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Cop: Do you know why I stopped you?
Biker: Let’s see… I was going with the flow of traffic, my signal lights are working and I use them when changing lanes; brake light in order (I do the T-CLOCS thing) … so, no, I have no idea… maybe you wanted to admire my awesome bike.
Cop: Humm! Do you know at what speed you were going?
Biker: The speed limit I am sure.
Cop: Really? What’s the speed limit?
Biker: Ah… the maximum velocity at which a vehicle is permitted to travel, as arbitrarily established by municipal, county or state law.
Cop: Are you some kind of comedian?
Biker: No, but if I were you would be giving me lots of material.
Cop: Here’s your ticket. Slow down.
Biker: See you in court. Have a flashy day officer
A few days later.
Judge: You stand accused of breaking code 117-C, how do you plead?
Biker: I usually plead on my knees your honor
Judge: Very funny… guilty or not guilty
Biker: Oh… not guilty your honor
Judge: Officer Malone has a different opinion
Biker: I am surprised Officer Malone has ANY opinion at all
Judge: Are you trying to be smart with me?
Biker: No your honor, I am not trying. I actually am smart.
Judge: 10 days in county jail for contempt of court
Biker: I’m afraid that is not possible your honor
Judge: Really? And why is that?
Biker: Because contempt requires familiarity, your honor, and frankly I don't know you or the court.
Judge: 15 days in county jail.
Later that day.
Cellmate: What are you in for?
Biker: For exceeding the IQ limit…